Pssst! A Warning to Married, Male Business Owners…
Men, I am about to give you a gift of enormous value, a secret which, if understood and implemented, will improve your home life, office life and marital relationship manyfold. It is, without a doubt, a golden nugget.
Here is the brutal truth:
A man’s relationship with his business is typically first in his life. His wife is second. There, I have said what we all really know to be the truth with male small business owners/entrepreneurs. This is not to say that married men do not love their wives, are not dedicated to them or do not hold them in the highest esteem. Of course they do… most of the time.
But frequently, a man’s first love is his business — whether or not he will admit it is another issue. Men must compete; small business owners are passionate about their business and will stay late, work on weekends and be thinking about their business 24/7. It is part of their DNA, their makeup. It is what men do.
But here is the deal — men must learn not to constantly remind their wives that they are second to the business. This we can do. Wives understand this relationship men have with their businesses, but they do not want to be constantly reminded that they come second, or at least, they do not want to be reminded as often.
How do we remind them?
- Always coming home late for dinner
- Not listening or paying attention to what women are saying, while privately thinking about our business instead
- Postponing vacations
…and on it goes. We all know what I am talking about.
Here is the cure:
- Keep your word to her. If you say you will be home at 6:00 pm, be home at 6:00 pm. Not 7:00 “because something happened” at work. You can do this, it is possible. She deserves it. Do it.
- When at home, pay attention to her and what she says. Listen to her fully and completely. Do not calculate cash flows while you are talking to her. Do not read/write emails while you are with her. Do not talk business to her, or on the phone, while with her.
- Show her complete attention and consideration while you are with her. It is not about quantity, it is about quality. Give her your best when you are with her and she will forgive you for holding your business in first consideration and her in second.
I could go much further on this subject, but if you do at least this much, you will go to the head of your class and enjoy a better quality of life both at home and in your business. You will have achieved more balance and will be doing the right thing.
Remember, a happy wife = a happy husband.
Bonus point: Many men who are fathers also put their children before their wives. This is a huge mistake. To be a good father you must first be a good husband.
Think about it. Do it. Your wife deserves it, and you along with your family will reap huge dividends from such consideration.
